My heart has been so full today... well it's always pretty full, but today I thought it might explode.
I've felt so many emotions...
sadness for me.
excitement for her.
loneliness for me.
pride for her.
questioning for me (did I do enough to prepare her?)
love love love for her.
Today was Mags first day of preschool and I can't even type it without my eyes brimming with tears.
I know, I know, she's growing up and that's good for her, but is it good for me?
I know, I know, it's not about me.
I've held on long enough and it's time to let her begin learning and growing on her own.
I even held on for an extra day... she was supposed to start yesterday...
but in my defense, I didn't know she was supposed to start yesterday until the night before and any sane person can understand that that morning I had no idea it was the last morning, and you have to have a last morning...
does any of this make sense?
(and don't even think of judging my grammar right now)
So anyway...
I held on for one last morning and this morning I let her go (or maybe she pulled out of my grip... I can't really remember).
As the teacher patted my shoulder and tears threatened to explode Maggie turned and said to both her Dad and I...
"Bye Mom... Bye Dad... Have a nice day!" Waving her hand vigorously over her head.
It's actually going to be really great for her and I think that is the only reason I haven't completely lost my marbles.
She'll be attending preschool half of the time and she'll be getting speech therapy the other half.
I feel like her speech is so so so much better than it used to be, but after having her assessed she's still considered behind and this is the best way to get her caught up. I know that this experience will only help her confidence grow and bring out even more of her bright personality.
I'm just going to miss her so.
Thanks for sharing these last 3 3/4 years with me wholeheartedly Miss Mags...
I have cherished it so much.
And I love you.
14 comments:
ahhh...I totally know where you're coming from. Tanner started preschool when he turned 3 specifically for help with his speech. It has been good but I'm a softie and if he ever says he doesn't feel like going I don't make him and I volunteer at the preschool because I want to know what he's doing and his little friends...it's so hard to let them go.
well i can understand why i would be so hard to leave her behind while she's wearing the cutest outfit EVER! i'm proud of you reg! and just think, if you ever get too lonely while she's gone i won't be too far away (well, at least after april 2).
It is a really big deal, and I am proud of you. Not an easy thing to do!
oh it is sad and it is a big deal and I wouldn't expect anything less than some tears from you...that's what makes you so great!! Lucy was so excited and couldn't wait to get me out the door which made it even sadder. At least you have a handsome little anderson to keep you busy!! good luck!!
Oh Regan, it really is a big, BIG deal. How do those 3 3/4 years go so quickly? I don't even want to think about all day, every day kindergarten.
Your so cute and such a loving mom.
Oh! That is sad!! I know I'm going to be the same when my baby boy Jack goes onto school. (P.s..mom is here helping me with the new baby and wants to know where you guys live now! email me!!)
what a big day! good job miss mags for being so brave. she's going to knock their socks off.
does she have to go everyday of the week? that breaks my heart. We started a little joy school here and i thought it was bad for 2 hours twice a week. i can't even think about real school yet. What a brave little miss and she looks ADORABLE!!! Good luck mom, i feel for you, even though i know it's not about you...but it is!
I love this post. Since you know me so well, you won't think I'm insensitive when I write that it almost made me laugh - I just love how attached you are to that beautiful little girl. Congrats on getting through the day!
she is definatle one of the best dressed children I have ever seen, I need to know your tricks (and where you get your great style) so morgan can look as cute as her.
-by brynn
I felt the SAME way! Each year gets harder for me for some reason..
i hear ya ... a huge deal.
and she is just so dang cute. too bad i don't have any sons for her to marry.
but jane and anderson?
Oh man that first picture is soo cute! i love her little outfit. Elias is going to start preschool come this September and will be the same age as mags.. i will feel just like you, i know it!
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